Q&A with Linjing Peng
From designing at Céline and Calvin Klein, to ceramics, DJing, dancing and painting - Linjing Peng's creative journey represents a quest for wholeness.
After years in the fashion industry at Céline and Calvin Klein, Linjing Peng wanted more. From the outside it may appear as though a fashion student turned designer for one of LVMH's leading brands was living the dream, but life isn't always what it seems. In a fascinating artistic journey characterised by introspection and transformation, catalysed by a diagnosis of depression and bipolar ii, Linjing Peng has been made the recipient of the prestigious Mosaic Award in collaboration with Hauser and Wirth. Her work also features at Vermillon Partner's current exhibition Even The Poets Were Jealous of These. Whilst her impressive accolade list is growing we get the sense that true success for Linjing is defined in the pursuit of healing. External validation from the rest of us, who get to enjoy her artistic exploits, is a byproduct not a motivation. What caught up with the multi-hyphenate creator to learn about choosing yourself, pleasing your inner child and what music we should all be listening to.
You've spoken openly about your diagnosis with depression and bi-polar ii influencing your craft. How far along in your creative journey were you when this happened and how do you think your creative practice would be different had you known this all along?
I am profoundly grateful for the journey through mental hardship as it has sculpted the person I am today. The diagnosis of depression occurred at my last year in Celine, followed by the diagnosis of bipolar disorder during the lockdown period. It was during this phase that I delved into the realms of ceramics and DJing. What truly altered both my being and my creative endeavors was the sensation of pain. Experiencing this agony spurred a resolute declaration within me—to never endure such anguish again. The pivotal change in my practice emerged from an exploration of trauma, a deeper understanding of myself, and the dedicated pursuit of self-healing. Presently, I channel my creativity towards contextualising and expressing the concept of trauma. I aim to share my experiences and the journey of personal growth. Reflecting upon this, I speculate that had I received the diagnosis earlier, it might have led me to understand trauma sooner, aiding in the discovery of my authentic self at an earlier juncture. In such a scenario, I envision an alternate path: forgoing traditional education in favour of investing my tuition towards broadening my horizons through travel. Exploring diverse facets of life and continuing to learn about subjects of personal interest would have been my focus, perpetually engaging in the act of creation and sharing insights derived from these experiences.
Do you think we conceive mental health differently here versus in China?
Mental health perspectives and approaches can vary significantly between the UK and China due to cultural, societal, and historical differences. In China, mental health has been stigmatised, labeled as “crazy” or “faulty”, historically has been seen through the lens of collectivism and family honour. There's often a strong emphasis on familial and social support rather than individualistic approaches. Seeking help for mental health issues can carry stigma due to concerns about family reputation. Traditionally, mental health problems might be managed within the family or community rather than seeking professional help.In the UK, mental health awareness has grown over the years, with efforts to reduce stigma and increase access to mental health services. There's an emphasis on individual autonomy, privacy, and seeking professional help through therapy, counselling, or medication.It's important to recognize that these are generalizations, and individuals' attitudes and beliefs can vary significantly.
What drew you to study womenswear design at CSM?
In retrospect, my desire back then was to immerse myself in the study of womenswear design at a prestigious university. However, with the wisdom of hindsight, I've come to realise that my inclination towards CSM womenswear was a coping mechanism stemming from my childhood experiences.Recent years have taught me a profound truth: the fundamental need for a child to feel loved, accepted, cared for, seen, and understood. Studies suggest that when a child lacks these crucial elements, they may develop an inclination towards fields such as fashion, entertainment, or sports to fulfill the emotional void they experienced during childhood. These pursuits often provide a semblance of the love, recognition, and acceptance they were deprived of in their formative years. Consequently, the identity I forged to survive guided my choice to pursue womenswear design. Although I still hold a passion for the craftsmanship inherent in garment design, I've grown averse to the toxic cultural connotations associated with the terms "fashion" and the "fashion industry." Regarding my pursuit of the best school, it was driven by an inner need to validate my self-worth. The aspiration to attend the best institution was a manifestation of my desire to prove “I’m good enough”.
How did you go from designing luxury items at Céline and designing for Calvin Klein to working with sculpture?
When I began my tenure at Céline, it marked a rare instance in my life when I felt my parent's pride in me. No longer perceived as the "troubled one" or as "not good enough," I transitioned from being the unpopular kid at school to suddenly having people seek my friendship. The fleeting rush of dopamine from external validation kept me content for a while. Yet, one day, those feelings waned. I woke up to a life that might have seemed ideal to others, but lacked the happiness I yearned for. I began questioning the trajectory of my life—where it was headed in the next 5 or 10 years. Ideally, I envisioned dedicating the next 5 to 10 years to creation and learning from other remarkable creatives I'd encountered, refining my craft. However, amidst this aspiration, I noticed the emergence of manipulation, exploitation, and unnecessary dramatics fueled by people's egos. I pondered whether I wanted these elements to shape the next decade of my life. The pivotal moment arrived with my diagnosis of depression. A colleague, whom I considered a friend, asked for my assistance with her personal project after our extensive work hours. Mind you, I was already putting in long days, often from 8 am to 10 pm, including weekends, while grappling with my condition. Despite my effort, I found myself in a bit of a slump when I helped her. When I explained my diagnosis and struggles, seeking a bit of understanding from her, her response shattered me. She retorted, "I am not your friend, I am your boss. Why do you only think about yourself? No wonder you are depressed because you're too selfish." This rebuke, following my help despite my condition, left me questioning my choices—was this all worth investing my life in? Subsequently, I took a two-year hiatus. I needed time to heal, to explore, and to understand myself. Then, the unforeseen onset of the COVID-19 pandemic exacerbated the challenges. However, this adversity proved a turning point. It nudged me to seek consistent professional help, overcoming the shame that previously hindered my progress. Therapy became a vital part of my journey. Additionally, with the luxury of extra time, I initiated a self-care regimen I coined the "soothing technique"—a curated list of activities I enjoy. Whenever I felt unwell, I'd choose an activity from this list. Interestingly, my most frequent choices were ceramics and DJing.
Your project Shelter critiques consumerism and finding peace beyond superficiality seems to be at the root of your practice. This seems somewhat at odds with working in fashion. Do you think that's a fair assessment and if so, is that part of why you ventured into other mediums?
Your insight is astute, indeed. Your perception is keen, no doubt. My contemplation of consumerism dates back to my university days, particularly during my final year project at CSM. In that endeavor, my intention was to subtly mock the sentiment associated with consumerism. It was within this period that I first glimpsed the stark disparity between the message I sought to communicate through my collection and the demands imposed by the fashion industry on such creations. This realization starkly contrasted my objectives with the industry's expectations. Moreover, the unfolding of life itself nudged me toward an alternative path that I found equally fulfilling. I’m just riding the wave.
Do you think making intricate pieces by hand emulates the childlike act of playing, since you try and remedy some childhood traumas through practice?
Absolutely, creating intricate pieces by hand can indeed echo the childlike act of playing. Engaging in such detailed, hands-on work often evokes a sense of playfulness akin to a child absorbed in their activities. The focus, the immersive nature of crafting, and the freedom to explore and experiment can evoke a similar joy and curiosity that children experience during play.Moreover, the act of working meticulously on pieces by hand can serve as a therapeutic practice to address childhood traumas. This process allows for a channeling of emotions, a meditative focus, and a form of self-expression that might aid in healing past wounds. It can provide a space for processing, understanding, and perhaps even resolving some of those lingering issues from the past.
Time for a less heavy question! We know you DJ as well, what tracks should we all be listening to?
Check out my recent set for UNFOLD at Fold club, search “UNFOLD LVIII - The Lust Emperor” on soundcloud;)
See Linjing's work at Even The Poets Were Jealous of These at Vermillon Partners
Linjing's portfolio
Article by Martyn Ewoma
Photography by Stephen White & Co
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